Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Can't We All Just Get Along???


Okay so we have for the most part established that there are hundreds of thousands of people out in the world today who advocate for dogs/pit bulls, who rescue and rehabilitate dogs/pit bulls and who dedicate themselves to being responsible dog/pit bull owners AND that through social media most of us have met and come to know one another or know of one another on some level.  


There are so many people working so hard to help so many dogs/pit bulls today that it seems somewhat unnerving and so sad to see 'relationships', or the lack thereof, get in the way of helping dogs/pit bulls. By relationships I mean people simply being able to focus on the ways in which we are alike and on the common goals/beliefs/philosophies we share.  I'm not talking BFF's here, that everyone has to be enamored of one another or even has to like one another.  I am simply talking about a decent, civil, mutually beneficial relationship formed to help dogs/pit bulls regardless of the many personal differences we may each have.  I truly would like to think that those of us who even have major differences in opinion on how to handle dogs and how to help those who need our help could set aside those differences long enough to help a dog and their human in need.


In my tenure as a pit bull advocate I have met many, many fine people who are intimately involved in advocating, rescue, rehabilitation and behavioral issues for dogs/pit bulls.  Each and every relationship formed, in my mind, is as good as gold; even if I don't share their philosophies or how they do things.  They are as good as gold because each one of them is another cog in the giant wheel that is grinding forth every moment of every day to help save and find loving responsible homes for dogs/pit bulls and is advocating for dogs/pit bulls in all of the ways they desperately need to be advocated for.  However sadly enough my 'golden relationships' when it comes to my capacity as a pit bull advocate has shrunk over time mostly due to others who will not maintain a relationship with anyone who doesn't see or do things their way one hundred percent.  I have been 'un-friended', and in a few cases 'blocked', on Facebook by people who at one time were among my biggest supporters and a valuable resource for assistance simply because I refuse to convert to their way or because I don't have a problem speaking up when I feel that they are being overly judgmental and/or emotional when we are trying to help a dog/pit bull.  Words cannot express my disappointment in this.  Not because it hurts on a personal level to be un-friended or even blocked on Facebook by someone, because it doesn't, but because with every person who turns away permanently simply because we don't see eye to eye on everything there is one less person to help when a dog is need.

It saddens me greatly as an observer of others in the animal welfare community how often differences of opinion and personality differences can adversely affect an attempt by someone to help a dog/pit bull.  The 'in-fighting' that I have observed wastes time when time is of the essence, diverts the attention away from the case at hand (usually a dog about to be euthanized or in dire need of rescue) and causes an outright uproar in social media that does nothing to help and does everything to make most animal welfare folks look like kooks who are in dire need of some intense psychotherapy or medication or both.  No one is expected to agree on everything, or even on anything, but when we have a common goal to help a living being that is unable to help itself we really need to stop worrying so much about our own personal agenda and what others may or may not do or think and begin to focus on the matter at hand; which is to save the life of a dog/pit bull that may not have anyone but us to advocate for it.  We may be that dog's only chance to live but yet we waste time arguing about training methodology (boy that's a hot button for sure), we waste time trying to psychoanalyze (but usually just to harshly judge) the previous owner of the dog, we get caught up in who is right and who is wrong and all along the clock is ticking and the dog's chances for living are fading fast.  

Is it our ego that dictates that we only work with those who are a lot like us in the animal welfare community or is it simply that we are allowing our emotions to over ride our common sense?  In the end I see so often where many involved in an attempt to help save a dogs/pit bulls life end up in an argument with other people on a point that has little or nothing to do with the issue or who would rather vilify and publicly destroy the person who may or may not be the reason why the dog needs help in the first place than to just put one's shoulder to the wheel, together, and get the dog to a safe place.  

Helping dogs/pit bulls is not for everyone nor is it for the faint hearted among us.  It can be emotionally draining even in the best of times and can be devastating emotionally in the worst of times but in the end we can't lose sight of why we are helping.  We do it for the dogs, right? What we do really is to help the dogs isn't it?  It's not about us, right?  So then why oh why do we allow so much personal/emotional crap to get in the way of maintaining relationships with people who can help us do what we do?  Why is it that we so often choose to cut our nose off to spite our face rather than simply decide that how this other person views things doesn't really matter as long as the dog/pit bull is safe?  

So the next time you are thinking about giving someone else some crap over training methodology or what a huge piece of shit a dog's current or former owner may be perhaps it might serve the entire animal welfare community better if you simply decided that it really is about saving the dog(s)/pit bull(s) and that it doesn't really matter if you agree with this other person or even like them...the main thing is to help the dog!!!

Photo provided by Sarah Reategui (Lovers Not Fighters Pit Bull Rescue)